Happy tears and Fun Life!

We all know the number one question of homeschoolers.... all together now..... "What about socialization?!?!" I think we've got it covered, between church activities and sports. However, we do know when we need more, and this is a perfect example of God answering a prayer before I even knew to pray it.

Before I had even decided for sure about home schooling Stacey, a client (now friend) of mine mentioned a group called Fun Life. It's a branch of the non-denominational organization called Young Life just for high-schoolers with special needs.

We took her Friday night and let me tell you... I was near tears the whole time!  I could tell she knew she fit in there. Sure, she's welcome at our church and our friends love her, but never before has she gone to an event and left with an invitation to a small group girls Bible study! Never has anyone asked for my cell number so they can invite her to parties and outings.  Not a family thing that she's "welcome to attend too", but an invitation extended to her specifically. *happy tears*

Fun Life meets every other Friday night. They have Pizza, sing and dance, skits, a Bible lesson and this week Stacey was in the ice cream eating contest! They gave her noise buffering headphones since it was so loud and she was covering one ear.  She sat with a leader and never looked back! I was so proud of her! She has been looking at the pictures on my phone every day and asking to go back!

I'm so excited for the independence this group will help her achieve. Next time we plan to drop her off and let her do her thing without being her paparazzi! haha!  

One of the things I noticed that showed me she knew she belonged was her voice. Even in settings with people she knows well, she will whisper or look away and not answer when they talk to her. At Fun Life, several times I heard her say "Hi" and "Yes" to greetings and offers of pizza or drink. She spoke loud and confident. I have never seen her do that to people she has just met. Never. Until now. In her comfort zone. Again with the happy tears. :) 

Another amazing change that night, was her behavior afterwards. We went to Starbucks and sat on the patio. A young man said hello to her and she actually said Hi nice and loud. He asked: "How are you?" and she said "Good." Then he asked "Is that your juice box?" She smiled and said "yes" nice and loud and showed it to him. I was dying!! She just had a conversation with a stranger!!  (we'll work on stranger danger another time. lol)

Oh, and don't think for a minute that  the humor of her chillaxin at Starbucks with a juice-box was missed in all that! Oh my sweet girl! :) 

Looking forward to seeing her grow and be involved in a life that she calls her own, not just tagging along with us. Ohhh how I wish she could commmunicate her thoughts about all this, but very thankful her behavior is speaking so clearly!

TIP: 6 things you need to know about personal space

TIP: It's not a good idea to touch a special needs person unless you know they like 

to be touched by you. Some are very sensitive to touch and personal space. If they 

reach a hand out, respond with your hand. Don't assume that means a full-on hug

 will be tolerated. Let them lead the contact. 

Stacey and Little Bro

                                                   

6 things you need to know about personal space:

1) The 10 mile radius: Some people have a very large "personal space" boundary. They don't like to be approached, stood or sat next to. The best thing you can do is pause and look at their body language. If they seem receptive to you, you might reach out to shake a hand or take a small step closer and watch for a response. 

2) Look but don't touch: Some might be okay with you being close to them, but don't want their possessions touched. Respect this.  No touchy. 

3) Free head locks: Some may have no personal boundaries. They not only like you to be close and touchy, but they might instigate touch not typically appropriate. It's okay to say to them something like "no hugging, but let's shake hands".

4) Yes, no, maybe so: Some are just down right unpredictable. They may hug you to death one day and scream when you approach the next day. Just go with the flow! 

5) Speak my language: Body language isn't always understood by everyone so use words and cues to get your point across.  

6) It's not me, it's the sensory:  Realize that sensory issues can't just be ignored. If you're unsure of what to do, it's better to keep a little distance and either ask a family member or wait to see what the person instigates first.